“The Prayer of a Mess.” I can’t find one anywhere!…
“Mess” meaning someone not mired in gross sin and filth, but bogged down in chaos and missed schedule points and tasks incomplete and objects dropped and spilled and mounting frustrations through the day.
I guess I’ll have to write my own…
“O Lord God, Creator of this whole, vast, intricate, millisecond clock-work, far-flung universe, Maker of nanoparticle precision, Source of perfection and order and beauty and timing, help!
“Deliver me somehow from my out-of-step, disordered, fragmented thinking and living.
“I’ve fallen so far behind myself I don’t know how to catch up! Or, what I should leave out and what take up as “next:” the thing listed next for this time of day, or one of the unfinished…?”
“All this performance procrastination is not on purpose, Lord.
“I just trailed off on side paths that highway-robbed my time. Then the attempted return to the day’s intended track stole more precious minutes, as new hindrances kept cropping up in my shortcuts like gnomes at bridges.
“Not the defiant, self-willed sinner growing increasingly vile, I’m become more the waif wandering a thick and weedy wood, distraught in distracted circles. Rescue me, I pray from my own ineptitude!”
Growing in frustration, and fear that I’ll fly all apart, and my little pieces go careening thither and yon through great Space, I utter a prayer much like that.
It’s that kind of wasted day.
But (A. W.) Tozer’s wisdom shines light into my cluttered brain and chases out those clamoring, competing demands like money-changers from the temple. He studied the lives and writings of many great men of the Faith and noted their way of defining a wasted day: a day missing time alone with God.
Not that my day totally lacked it. But what time I did “find” was plagued with self-distractions and inattentiveness.
So. I. stop.
So. I. rest.
So. I. still. Shut up, that is, except for reading scripture aloud, but then to listen to its words, rather than blather.
I take time, I make time, for this one thing (Ph 3:13-14), this good part that won’t be taken away… (Lk 10:42).
And the flying-apart fragments of mind and soul and spirit quiet to slow and settle to rest and all begins to come together again, under the cohesive force of Him in Whom all things hold together.