Just this today:

Moments of stillness. Sunlight and shadows play tag on a tabletop, over books and papers, across index cards bearing precious Bible verses, and up and down my corduroy sleeve. I sit, letting the Light call the shots, orchestrate all the dancing – outward on the table, inward on the heart strings and soulworks.

It’s a change-of-plan day. I had big ideas… But…

I’m thanking God I’m not out there, chasing foolish ambition, on this sunny but chilled windy day – not trying to build a whole large “lasagna bed” in the old herb garden, with wild gusts stirring up a tomorrow head-cold, and a today frustration of wind-whipped black plastic and dampened newspapers, compost-chopped leaves and wispy grass clippings, flying in manic fits, everywhere.

I resigned that battle.

I’m not losing; I’m choosing. Choosing to relinquish the (over)ambitious – the kind of thing I too easily indulge before “counting the cost” (as Husband gently admonished, this morning), too often loading myself with unneeded burdens (as Crumbs from His Table so wisely warned, yesterday).

Putting all this together with today’s Bible verses and the printed devotions I “just happened” on, I get the strong sense my plans were not God’s!

The gist of the printed matter: (S)he with the task of encouraging others in Christ, of sharing words of God’s truth and good purpose, must first sink them down deep into [her] own soul, must draw aside to commune with their Author, drink rich from His wellspring, gather His leading – so there’s something to draw from the storehouse – so that what one draws out is God’s choice for the sharing.

“The hardworking farmer must be first to partake of the crops” (2 Timothy 2:6).

Just feeding and ruminating in speckled dancing sunlight today.

Joy. Quiet joy.


Beholding Glory

4 thoughts on “A Holy Pause

  1. Quiet Joy on purpose. Refreshing to not rush but to experience stillness. Yesterday, I woke to hear the angels sing, not with my human ears, but in my heart. They sang, “Be still my soul, and know that He is God. Be still my soul and know that He lives within my heart.”

    1. Beautiful, Hazel! Yes. I’ve been aiming to program my mind to think thanks to God on waking. What a beautiful wake-up that one of yours was!

  2. Popped in from the not about me november link-up 🙂 I so much enjoyed this piece. Recently I’ve become temporarily disabled. I cannot walk without a walker and I’m recovering from multiple injuries. It’s so hard to be this way – to be forced into stillness. And I’m finding that even though I’m unable to do so much of what I need to do (and usually have to do), I still wrestle with truly being still and enjoying the presence of God. It is like you said, choosing. I have lost much, but I can gain tremendous blessing when I choose to embrace the place he has me right now.

    1. Yes, Alyssa,
      Embrace. That is exactly the word! Exactly the best choice.
      I have been sidelined from much (too much?) ministry activity by a combination of more things than I can recount here. The latest: progressive loss of vision from a corneal dystrophy now worsening enough that I can no longer drive even locally with confidence. But then I was already sidelined.
      Closed doors could have me in the pits, but choosing to (not just put up with, but) embrace this new turn in life… well, it really is opening up new rich facets of life in Christ that I wish I’d known long ago. Keep embracing the place where He has you and keep your eyes open for unexpected blessings. You might want to poke around in my blog posts over past months to clue out how this has been playing out for me. I really wouldn’t trade where I am now for where I was before the sidelining. It’s that good.
      Prayers for you.

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