I am so exhausted, I can’t write.
But wait. I. am. writing. My fingers are moving on a keyboard. But little, with as little exertion as possible.
I am so fatigued I can barely think.
Husband has gone out for take-out.
I thought I was long past reaching beyond my limits, pushing myself further than my body could sensibly attain. I thought I had learned when time to stop had arrived, and that I would stop, and simply draw aside with Him, or do some quiet thing.
No, still driven. To distraction. To the point where now I must lose a day to gain my breath and stamina and equilibrium and get on with the next thing. I feel embarrassed, foolish, vain.
I have about five post starts in my head, and one post nearly done on computer. But I got interrupted by pleasant surprises and busy ambitions, and in I dived, over my head…
So, instead of those posts, this. This for dearly beloved cyber-friends, who got concerned at a previous gap when my posts weren’t appearing as usual. You astonished me with God’s love shed abroad in your hearts and emails. I find amazing this thing that can happen in blogging communities, where new friendships arise from who-knows-where, maybe even continents apart, and yet draw close in Him.
I feel I need to let you know: I’ll be back! All is well but this deep fatigue. I’m happy a-plenty. I’m just physically wiped out.
Yet there are so many reasons to praise Him. In my personal journal, I’ve already counted 735, backed by scripture, and I don’t think I’ll run out of new ones anytime soon. I’ll be copying some into a coming post. Shortly, God willing.
Blessings to all. You are all blessings to me.
4 thoughts on “On Exhaustion and Cyber Friends”
Sylvia! I’m so glad you posted something! [I was just thinking as I typed in your URL that if you hadn’t posted anything new I’d better make time to email you tomorrow. 🙂 ] I truly appreciate the update. I’ve been struggling with this a lot, too. Distraction. Not stopping and drawing aside to be with Him. I’m out of excuses, but I make them up anyway. I tried to take today off, spend more time with Him, get important work done instead of wasting time on trivial things. I don’t think it worked, otherwise I’d be in bed by now. Still praying for you, and praying that this fatigue will go away.
Oh, it is amazing what can happen in blogging communities!!! I am amazed that I somehow can miss people I have never even met, feel such longing to be with them in person that it’s as if we’d been “face-to-face” friends for a very long time. It’s so wonderful how He does that! I’ve been so, so blessed by my “cyber-friends” – especially you :). Looking forward to hearing more soon.
I have been gone a week so I hadn’t noticed you were gone, but I would have this morning as I always look first thing for sylvrpen in my e-mail inbox. God spared me the wondering as my inbox contained your notification right on schedule.
Do rest, my Dear CyberSoulMate, we all need that from time to time, but it is a blessing to have the “heads up” if you plan to be gone a bit. Thank you.
Rest up and be blessed, Sylvia!
I’m praying for rest and renewal, friend. Sometimes a little break does the heart and mind good. (I took a bit of an extended month all through April.) And I’m still not completely back into the swing of things. 🙂
Thank you for praying for my brother today. I really appreciate it.
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